zapidos:

My little brother and I were swimming and my dad walked out and said “it’s trash day tomorrow you know what that means” and my brother looked at me dead in the eyes and said “it’s time for you to go.”

110,802 notes

mrcraabs:

why the fuck cant i have a best friend who lives 30 seconds away from me who always comes over and we just stay at each others houses whenever movies are so deceiving

553,898 notes

egberts:

i dont understand people who only sleep with one pillow

553,548 notes

peperomint:

nail polish on fingernails: 2 days
nail polish on toenails: 200 years. ur ghost will have glittery toes. ur descendants will come out of the womb w/ revlon 791 midnight affair perfectly applied. infinite

143,535 notes

queercorn:

*straight people voice* is he… you know…

453,861 notes

canadianslut:

*listens to an acoustic performance*

ohhh so that’s what they’re saying

472,495 notes

euo:

never ask white people what their ethnicity is unless you wanna hear a list of every european country and meaningless fractions

322,841 notes

iamthebluebeetle:

This looks like it could kill me but I want 10 portions.
aciddaisies:

 soft grunge/models 
i couldnt recognize these animals without hair omgggg

nishlo:

when people jokingly pick on u but its something ur sensitive about

image

247,013 notes

cleandiaper2:

george-hairrison:

My cat is so smelly but I kiss her anyway

9 notes

every romantic teen movie

maurypovichofficial:

*girl plays acoustic guitar and sings*

guy: wow…you’re..you’re amazing you can really sing

girl: :) thanks. i haven’t sang since my mom died

48,475 notes

tavrisprite:

tavrisprite:

so basically um im horny 

image

do you know what these all say?

"hi horny im dad"

441,897 notes

hey guys! this theme was made by pale-themes and the name of it is theme #3. if you want to see more, please click here.